Nina offered. But obviously she's a Corporalki. It's not the same. And she has even less experience, although she is quite good at what she does.
[ all these admissions trail off, weakening her case. it feels like she's failing to defend something. she swallows the stone sitting in her throat and flatters him. ]
I want it to be you. We've barely gotten any time alone together, here.
I thought we had already established that. I know things have been chaotic. Neither of us has been our best. But I told you. My feelings are real.
[ and he had used that. she won't feel guilty for doing the same. even now they trouble and gnaw at her, making this hard. but she really believes that any alternative will be worse -- not just for her. for ravka. ]
What about the otkazat'sya and grisha lost to the Fold? Weren't they entitled to a life? They weren't kings or diplomats deciding how grisha should be treated. They were just people.
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Will you?
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( but it's not a no. )
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[ all these admissions trail off, weakening her case. it feels like she's failing to defend something. she swallows the stone sitting in her throat and flatters him. ]
I want it to be you.
We've barely gotten any time alone together, here.
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To be alone with me.
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I know things have been chaotic. Neither of us has been our best. But I told you. My feelings are real.
[ and he had used that. she won't feel guilty for doing the same. even now they trouble and gnaw at her, making this hard. but she really believes that any alternative will be worse -- not just for her. for ravka. ]
I thought yours were too.
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you.
Somewhere unlikely to draw the wrong sort of notice.
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You'll have to show me the way.
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[ it's deceptively easy to fall back into this. especially when he is not in front of her. this comms device, she realizes, might be dangerous. ]
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( it's not the first word that came to mind. )
I did have a life before I became the leader of the Second Army.
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[ if she can believe it's true. ]
Has it always been like this for the Grisha? As long as you've been alive?
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The Black Heretic.
Was he punishing them?
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Are we not as entitled to life as the otkazat'sya?
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Weren't they entitled to a life?
They weren't kings or diplomats deciding how grisha should be treated. They were just people.
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Whatever the intention, the loss of life extended well beyond what could ever be considered acceptable.
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[ but does he think so?? does he really?? ]
Do you think it's going to be like that for me, too? Living that long.
I feel ridiculous. 😳 You've lived several lives and I'm only just starting mine.
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The war will be over, for one.
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And of all of us, you are the only one truly free.
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