@rubilykskoye inbox

[sunmon]

● ○ ○ ○

○ ● ○ ○

○ ○ ● ○

○ ○ ○ ●

alina starkov, 20

ABOUT_YOU

CODE BY

Comments

[sunmon]

Ianthe, no.

[ she takes ianthe's face in her hands, suddenly serious. ]

That fear is the only thing keeping you from doing something incredibly stupid. If you get rid of it, how much worse might it get by the time you're back?

[princess_of_ida]

It's a price I'm willing to pay to get the heart back. I need her to recover.

[Her eyes flickered over toward where the others were readying themselves to leave.]

And they need me to be unshakeable out there.

[Ianthe had to be a lyctor, not a scared little girl afraid of the dark. This was the last time she felt safe to express her steadily growing dread.]

[sunmon]

Not as badly as I need you to come back here.

[ she tries to turn ianthe's face back towards her. away from the others leaving, away from the very good reasons she has for burying that fear. ]

Fear isn't something to be ashamed of. Fear is smart. It will keep you alive.

[princess_of_ida]

[Her face is turned back easily, Ianthe leaning down to rest her forehead against Alina's. It was almost too easy, pulling on her selfishness on her wish to have Alina need her, want her, someday love her.]

I don't want to be a liability. I don't want them to know I'm afraid. Only you. No one but you knows how bad it got. It's why I'm glad you're staying. Don't want to hurt you again cause I went crazy.

[sunmon]

Don't tell me you're still carrying that around. [ the guilt. alina sighs. ] I haven't exactly been immune to the Void's influence, either.

[ or other influences. she doesn't raise that point. doesn't want to touch it. ]

I think we've evened that score.

[princess_of_ida]

[If she did it once before, Ianthe knew she could do it again. But it was fear driving her far more than guilt. But Alina was right.]

Okay, okay... I'll try not to do anything drastic to deal with this... Void shit without talking it over with you first.

[sunmon]

[ a deep breath. exhaled as alina leans her head against ianthe's chest. it's nice, how much taller she is, how she can hear ianthe's heart when she presses her cheek to the softness of her breasts. her arms slip around ianthe's ribs, holding tight. ]

Thank you.

[princess_of_ida]

[She didn't want to go. She wanted to stay right there in that moment, holding onto Alina, feeling the warmth abd bony bits of her body (she kept losing weight, she noted). But so much of Ianthe's life was never about what she wanted but what she had to do.

She had to go. She had to find the heart. Failure was not an option. But she allowed herself this moment, no matter what her sister's voice said about Alina.]

I redid the wards and added some bone dust so they'll last for however long I'm gone. Hopefully this place won't go to shit in the meantime, but if it does... be safe.

[sunmon]

Don't worry about me. [ she smiles as she draws back. it's a tired smile, but genuine. ] Town is the safest place I can be, right now. I'll be bored, I'm sure. Maybe I'll finally finish the mural while you're gone.

[princess_of_ida]

That's be nice to come home to. [Ianthe drew Alina into a soft kiss.] I need to go before it gets harder.

[sunmon]

Go.

[ another kiss, then she squeezes ianthe's arm and steps back more fully. ]

I'll be here when you're back.

[princess_of_ida]

[There was a moment where Ianthe wasn't going to let go then phalanges released and she nodded. She needed to go, she needed to shove her fear into a box.

Her eyes lingered on Alina a few more heartbeats, then she turned without further parting words to join the others. Time to put the mask back on and find a fucking heart.]