she'd tried not to think about that. just like she tries not to think about genya's scars and the guilt she feels for those. all the ways in which her choices had gotten other people hurt. ]
I'm not a child. [ in a voice that sounds very much like a child, defensive and petulant. she can't help it. he's telling her how much he regrets not hiding more from her when she has only just begun to unravel all of the things he'd hidden. how foolish he must think she is. how right he had been, before. ] I can handle the truth.
[ never mind that he's utterly correct. that the fear of running alone through tsibeya had morphed into the ghastly overwhelm of reuniting with mal and discovering what she believed to be the extent of aleksander's manipulation, only to then run through more woods from more monsters and learn from genya that baghra and mal had not even amounted to half of the darkling's crimes.
it had been a hell of a day. a hell of a day, and no one to lean on for that pain. it's hard not to feel a little tempted by aleksander's implicit offer to be that person, that crutch. which is precisely why she has to rebuff him. ]
no subject
she'd tried not to think about that. just like she tries not to think about genya's scars and the guilt she feels for those. all the ways in which her choices had gotten other people hurt. ]
I'm not a child. [ in a voice that sounds very much like a child, defensive and petulant. she can't help it. he's telling her how much he regrets not hiding more from her when she has only just begun to unravel all of the things he'd hidden. how foolish he must think she is. how right he had been, before. ] I can handle the truth.
[ never mind that he's utterly correct. that the fear of running alone through tsibeya had morphed into the ghastly overwhelm of reuniting with mal and discovering what she believed to be the extent of aleksander's manipulation, only to then run through more woods from more monsters and learn from genya that baghra and mal had not even amounted to half of the darkling's crimes.
it had been a hell of a day. a hell of a day, and no one to lean on for that pain. it's hard not to feel a little tempted by aleksander's implicit offer to be that person, that crutch. which is precisely why she has to rebuff him. ]